Dealing with a ‘Bridezilla’
Remember when your beautiful friend (let’s call her Jane) became engaged?
Jane rang you immediately, sharing the news and your heart soared with happiness and excitement. When she asked you to be part of her bride tribe you couldn’t wipe the smile from your face – accepting the offer and picturing all the happy moments that lay ahead. Imagine the fun you will have getting all ‘Pretty Woman’ in bridal stores. The hens, oh my God, the hens will be the party of a lifetime and the hangovers will be completely worth it. And the day! Waking on the day of the wedding and standing by her side as she marries the love of her life.
But 12 months in, bestie Jane has completely lost the plot! So much so, that you’re left wondering where Jane has gone and who is the drill sergeant in her place. Sure, you loved the moment she burst into tears as she found her dress, but did you really need to spend eight Saturday’s of your life watching sixteen million beads be hand-sewn onto her dress? Sure, you were supportive of her getting healthy, but on day three of her juice cleanse (that she does every second week) she’s a total b**tch and now she’s requesting that her bridal shower start with a boot camp and involve clean eating – say what!?!
The relentless emails, texts and expectations are really starting to wear thin – and you’re definitely questioning your friendship.
So what does a bridesmaid do when bridezilla has reared her head and doesn’t look like going anywhere soon?
Here are Ivory Tribe’s top tips for handling your bridezilla.
While it’s completely frustrating to see your friend turn into someone they generally are not, it’s worthwhile to lend an ear. Hear her out, maybe some of her frustrations and valid and you can offer a solution. As we know a problem shared is a problem halved and once she’s voiced her concern perhaps she will feel like she’s got it off her chest and her behaviour will go back to normal.
If there are other bridesmaids, it’s likely they’re feeling the heat also. However, the last thing you should do is talk to the rest of the bride tribe, creating a bitchy atmosphere and an ‘us’ against ‘her’ vibe. If you need to vent, speak to someone that has nothing to do with the wedding, but do keep in mind, it’s a small world.
SUCK IT UP PRINCESS
If you’re the kind of person that hates confrontation, and let’s face it, have the patience of the saint. Suck it up. Knowing that the wedding ordeal will be over soon and that your friend will return to normal sometimes is the path you may want to go down.
THIS IS YOUR INTERVENTION
If it’s gone too far and you feel like not only is their behaviour impacting you, but also her family and friends, it may be time to stage an intervention. Sit her down and talk with her, explaining how her behaviour has made you feel. Don’t attack. Rather, talk calmly and rationally and understand that she is initially going to be on the defence, it is afterall a stressful time. Try and be understanding and offer solutions.
At the end of the day, you’re friends with this person because you genuinely love and care for them – so the friendship is definitely worth salvaging and fighting for.